Parenting in GRACE

I have recently learned more about parenting by grace rather than by law.  After adopting, my parenting styles had to be shifted once again, as it did to fit each of my biological children's needs.  What I have learned about parenting an adopted child by grace can and does apply to my biological children as well.  I am so thankful that my eyes have been opened to the depth of grace.  I took these nuggets away from a recent conference I attended...

The law shows you what is wrong with you (sin-conscious).
Grace reveals that you are the righteousness of God in Christ (Christ-conscious).

The law relies on external controls.
Grace trains in Holy Spirit control.

The law focuses on sin/sin prevention.
Grace focuses on Identity/Destiny.

The law is rigid.
Grace gives Spirit-led choices.

The law works in the context of rules.
Grace works in the context of relationship.

The law controls.
Grace empowers.

The law punishes.
Grace trains/disciples.

The law is backward looking.
Grace is forward looking.

The law withholds intimacy/creates emotional distance.
Grace creates intimacy.

The law stimulates shame, fear, hiding, and bondage.
Grace produces openness, encouragement, and freedom to make mistakes.

The law is conforming.
Grace is transforming.

The law requires/forces performance.
Grace yields and expects fruitfulness (as a natural consequence).

As I study what grace looks like, I know that I want to parent by grace just as my Heavenly Father "parents" me.  Grace cannot be an excuse for your children to run all over you but, if used corretly, parenting by grace can bring a peace and togetherness to your home that you have never experienced before.

For further study read Grace Based Parenting by Tim Kimmel.